Andy Richter Quotes

"Robert called me and said, "I'm gonna be working with this guy Conan O'Brien who's taking over Letterman's show. Do you wanna meet him, maybe get a job as a writer on the show?" And I said yeah, I'm tired of eating baloney. I had started to apply for day jobs, which up till that point I had been able to avoid for three years, you know, waiting on tables or whatever."
-Andy Richter

"Some people are born with a brain that has this weird, magical mathematical thing that makes them an amazing jazz musician."
-Andy Richter

"I kinda feel like I know the funniest people. I guess Bill Murray. It's really, really hard for him to do wrong in my estimate. We just rented The Man Who Knew Too Little, and it's a pretty misguided movie. But there are things that he does that are so funny."
-Andy Richter

"We've been swimming at nude beaches and I love to go skinny dipping, but I'm sorry, sitting on top of a mountain, that's just, you're trying to show off or something. That's ridiculous."
-Andy Richter

"Because homecoming came first, and there was the homecoming court. The five guys on homecoming court were disqualified from being in the prom court. So being prom king was being sixth most popular."
-Andy Richter

"Since she got a cause and stopped being funny. I think she's real funny, but lately it's all been hearts and flowers and tears and saving teenagers and creating a role model. And that ain't funny. No giggles there."
-Andy Richter

"You're boring me. You're doing it wrong."
-Andy Richter